What do you mean by surrendering to Nature?
He was asked this, by some one, whom he loves and the usual glib tongue of his fell silent. He thought about this, but he could not find an answers as the process itself is something which he has not understood or has not understood long enough to explain. He searched his soul, he looked deep within to find the resonance of things to create for him the words his mind could not come up with.
What is Nature? For him, Nature, is the benevolent Mother, whom he equates with the Life force. For him, Nature, is the reason for the Sun to be bright and for the Moon to mellow. The way he sees Nature, is similar to the way he sees his mother. A mother she is to him, yet she is the mother universal. A mother, who always was there with him, in every form, in every sense of the world. She was there before he was even he, she will be there even after he ceases to be he, and She will be there forever.
Has She the powers to influence his destiny? He fought with her for long, he was antagonistic towards Her, he refused to listen to her. His mistakes touched the sky, this life of his, was unbearable, he could not even think of continuing life as he knew it. Chances were given to him, he blew them up. She was benign, She gave him chances twice, yet he did not know what they were. An ignorant child he was, kicked at the chances She had given, Cried fie on Her creation, and some how, did not know that the fight would be futile.
Ran, he from the way She wanted life to be led. Wanted to be something, which he always thought it was, but he knew not what. Kept screaming, kept shouting, yet he knew not, what he wanted. Those were the days of sadness and distress for him. A burning pyre his heart had become, the very life breath drew the fumes from Haydes. Life, as he knew it was a constant haunting from the mistakes, he had made and the excuses he wanted to crop up to justify his mistakes. The outer calm, deceived many, but his inner turmoil, made him cringe in pain. He asked questions, answers of which he knew, not, yet he wanted to be answered.
What was he looking for? May be he wanted something, which he knew not he had. His impatience, refused to show him the calm he had within, and yet he was too loud to hear the words of contentment that rose from the depth of his soul. The words were mild and gentle, he would have been soothed, but he heard them not. So he had the look of the hunted in his eyes and the poison had entered his heart.
Cornered he was, he knew not where to go. His enemy was within, he knew not how to handle. He scanned the skies, he scanned the ground, for his foes, knowing fully well that they are with in. He knew not, what it meant to be at peace as sleep the slient comforter had deserted his soul.
It was then, a gentle hand fell on his head and he at once opened his eye to the beauty of Her. It was the teary eyes of the mother, which looked down at his despair. The soothing touch, that came on him, was of Nature, who was the Mother tormented by the pains he had brought on to himself. Her tears, dowsed the fires that were there with in, and then he knew what peace was.
What was it that got Her into his life? Nothing, the suffering, the pain that he had gone through was not real for sure, yet it has the illusion to be more than real. It has eclipsed his soul, and then he had cried out in pain towards the Mother, who was always in shadows. Her presence was dramatic, as She always is. She came and destroyed the drama and gave him peace.
What about surrender then? He just gave up. Lifted his hand towards the sky and just said, let go. I have fought enough, God knows I have tried hard enough. All I can say, is that I am weak, I can’t fight against you. Spare me, give me strength, was the anguished cry from his soul. And She had stepped in. It was surrender for him, to give up his ego, of being the doer. He become the done, and he was at peace.
